Dear Pieces of Shit,
In the last six weeks of running this Caption Contest I've learned some things. Things that would lead a less compassionate man to acts of unspeakable violence against all of you uninspired artists. Thankfully for you, my back gave out the last time I used a pipe iron to express my internal creative angst, and the doctor told me that one more whack could be my last. Now I know none of you have health insurance, but I'm not trying to end up in a box just because you assholes couldn't think outside of yours. So, I've decided instead to paint myself out of this surrealist bullshit you call a community and get back to what Vinny does best: not giving a shit about anyone or anything.
If you're wandering how I'll be focusing my superior intellect it will be on the education of my only son, Little Anthony. After witnessing how the school system competely failed you retarded Rembrandt's I've decided to pull him out of pre school and dedicate the rest of my life to ensuring that he doesn't end up a lobotomized BFA or MFA (Bad Fucking Artist, Miserable Fucking Artist).
Before I depart indefinitely from this spineless cuddle pile of Picasso wannabes, let me say a few words to the unlucky sack of nutcrust who inherits this thankless position: Welcome to hell.
Now and Forever, fuck you.
As a parting gift (which you're probably too brain dead to appreciate) , here's a picture of me while I'm waiting at the airport that will hopefully take me as far away from you talentless Illiterates.