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Caption Contest 4


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Caption Contest 4

Today is the jewish day of repentance, and though I generally have about as much in common with those shmucks  as a meatball sub has in common with a falafel wrap, still, in this particular instance I think you all could take a note from the guilt ridden rabbis. Today I want you all to think long and hard about how much you've trangressed against the English language and my valuable time. Now, Webster's might forgive you for all your butchered words, but you all owe me a fucking vacation from your ignorance.   Please redeem yourselves with this photo.     ...Read more

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tags: Caption Contest

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Oliver Bishop Young's Dumpsters Transformed


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Oliver Bishop Young

              Table tennis skip for YCN from OliverBishopYoung on Vimeo.   See more from Oliver Bishop Young Here...Read more

Caption Contest Week 3


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Caption Contest Week 3

  One day Little Anthony asked me to tell him a story before he went to sleep. I told him to shut up already, but he kept crying like such a freaking baby about being scared of the dark, that I decided to curb that ninny bullshit right there and then, because no son of mine was going to grow up to be like one of you  bedwetting, Little Nemo artists. So I told him a story, and since then he's never complained about the dark again. It occurs to me after yet another dismal Caption Contest this last week,that makes your posts so completely bland and unimaginative, maybe like Little Anthony, you're all scared not to suck. So, here's the story I told my son, maybe it will knock the wuss...Read more

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tags: Caption Contest

9 comments

Caption Contest 2 = Be Funnier, Win Shit


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Caption Contest 2 = Be Funnier, Win Shit

As I suspected you're all not only illiterate, but also retarded. Now, holster those self-righteous politically correct pointer fingers,  I've got nothing against the mentally challenged.  They are not retarded.  They make me laugh. You pieces of shit on the other hand, with every conceivable capacity for conscious thought, couldn't make me laugh even once this week. Two comments even evoked facial responses, and they came from people who work for Illiterate for fuck's sake.  Seriously, it depresses me, all of your pathetic attempts. If I didn't have Little Anthony to think about, I'd've put myself out of your misery already. Still it was the first week of the Illiterate ...Read more

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tags: Caption Contest

21 comments

The Perfect Illiterate Billboard


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The Perfect Illiterate Billboard

Sometimes you just happen upon something so absurdly ironic that it makes you think, "Hey maybe I should get off my bike and take a picture of this".  I only hope Bridge Linguatec teaches you to speak better than they can spell....Read more

Caption Contest = Be Funny. Win Stuff.


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Caption Contest = Be Funny. Win Stuff.

DISCLAIMER: If any two of the following traits applies to your personality,  scroll down to the next list: a) impatient (can't wait for shit) b) busy (don't have time for shit) c) cocky (think your the shit) d) illiterate (can't read for shit) e) opportunist (will do anything to win some shit even if that shit is actual just shit)     Shut up, you're a nobody. Who the hell am I? Who the hell are you?  My name is Vincenzo Valentine, aka Vinny V aka go fuck yourself. I don't do art, and I don't care about the collage you just made in art class or the poem you cried into your little black notebook last night. Last week my four year old, little Anthony, came home fr...Read more

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tags: Caption Contest

7 comments

CMYK + RGB Dance Battle


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CMYK + RGB Dance Battle

When RGB pixels and CMYK dots meet on the street things get said, sides get taken, and it's only a matter of time before the color war commenses. The only thing to do in this situation is grab for the nearest copy of MJ's Thriller (RIP), hit play on your boombox and let them have it out in the middle of the crosswalk. That or just beat it!   They told him, "Don't you ever come around here   Don't wanna see your face, you better disappear"   The fire's in their eyes and their words are really clear, so beat it, just beat it   You better run, you better do what you can   Don't wanna see no blood, don't be a macho man   You wanna be tough, ...Read more

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tags: CMYK+RGB

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NEW Illiterate Themes!


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NEW Illiterate Themes!

Illiterate has two new themes to choose when submitting, CMYK+RGB and Trash to Treasure. Find out more in the Theme's section....Read more

Scratching the Surface


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As a substitute for live dialogue, the email interview is an awkward body double at best, the mini me of face-to-face journalism.  By nature choppy and impersonal email question and answer sessions take a series of canned questions and preared answers, throw them together and hope for a semblance of continuos conversation. However, the inherently stale format of electronic communication makes it a unique character unto itself deserving of its own time in the spotlight. In comes Scracthing the Surface, Illiterate's new Featured series of questionnaires and answers, where we send out short surveys to artists and writers, much like the formulaic icebreakers passed out on the first day of s...Read more

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